Devin Dornbrock The world is a chaotic and hectic place. People hurt each other all the time or take advantage of them with no regard for their feelings. That’s why I’m talking about the value of patience and grace.
It may sound preachy, but if we all held our emotions in a little longer and helped people out a little bit more, society would be infinitely better. I think we’ve all had times when we’ve lost our cool and seen everything go up in flames. Waiting for your moment will work way better in the long run.
Patience is a virtue
It is unfortunate that losing your sh*t doesn’t usually do you any favors. Getting mad, upset, or even mildly irritated is usually seen as being overly emotional. Especially in professional settings… Even if the feelings are totally justified.
Learning the value of patience and grace can be pretty handy, though. If you can keep calm even in unfair situations, you will get the greatest benefit out of them. Staying patient can allow you the time to gather your thoughts and deal with things in the best possible way. It may not feel fair, but that’s kind of how life is.
Let’s explore a hypothetical situation to see the value of patience in action.
Scenario #1: Up For a Promotion
Imagine, for a moment, you’re working the same retail job you’ve had for a few years now. You’re up for a promotion, and you’re sure you will get it. You even told your friends and family about it, and everyone is ready to celebrate with you. Life is good! Until your boss lets you know they can’t afford to give you that promotion.
Maybe they hired their super unqualified nephew, or they claim they can’t afford the money for your raise. Whatever the reason, you have some options for how to react.
Option A: Quit on the spot and rant about the business on TikTok or Reddit. It’ll feel good at the moment, especially once the online validation starts pouring in. Maybe you’ll even get some people to review bomb the business.
Option B: you swallow some choice words and quietly start applying to new jobs. You’re good at your job, and your experience will be appreciated elsewhere, so you get some good offers before too long. You take those offers to your boss and let them know you can either negotiate that raise again or you’re giving your notice.
Most of us would agree Option B is the better outcome even if Option A makes you feel more vindicated at the moment. Option B involves understanding the value of patience.
Knowing how to take your frustration and pour it into something productive instead of lashing out emotionally is hard. It’s not even fair either because your frustrations are valid! You should be able to lash out when someone stabs you in the back. If you want to keep the advantage, it’s better to hold your tongue and wait for your moment to make a move.
Patience isn’t the only thing that can benefit us, though.
Everyone needs some grace
There are a few definitions of the word “grace.” The one we’re talking about today is about showing goodwill to others.
I will be the first to admit I don’t show grace enough daily. If someone annoys me even a little, I’m much more inclined to be petty than understanding. Granted, it also takes a lot for me to act against people, even if they annoy me.
There are tons of people who are just like me as well. People who would rather act petty than think for a second about what someone else may be going through and give them the grace of helping them out. Or even giving them a little extra wiggle room when it comes to losing their tempers.
We’ve all seen videos online of people being “Karens” and losing their composure over the littlest things. Think about how much better the world would be if we all made an effort to show goodwill and grace to each other instead of sharing clips of petty wins on the internet for clout.
If everyone shows some grace and pays it forward, that same grace will eventually be reciprocated. You never know when you might need it. Basically, I’m saying that you should put out into the world what you wish to get back.
Scenario #2: The Job Interview
In this scenario, you’re on your way to an interview for a job you really want. Traffic was terrible, though, and you’re running late. You manage to get to the building within a minute until your interview time, but an older person is coming with an armful of bags.
You have to make a split-second decision to either help this older adult or sprint to make it to your interview on time. Most people would probably choose the interview. Someone else can help them, right? If you stop to help, you could lose the chance at this job.
I argue that it’s more important to take a moment to help the elderly person. Even if you don’t take their load from them or hold open the door yourself, at least get someone else who can. Whether you believe in karma or not, it’s better to live in a world where people help each other and put good into it than one where they only think about themselves. There is real value in patience and grace.
Maybe you’ll even accidentally help the company’s CEO, who can put in a good word for you after the interview.
There’s no guarantee that putting grace out into the world will return anything back to you. If nothing else, you’ll feel good about yourself and the things you’ve done, which is a reward in itself. Some research even suggests that showing grace and kindness to others decreases stress hormones and anxiety levels!
Putting good out into the world isn’t second nature to everyone, but that’s okay. Start by doing some smaller, intentionally good things. If you keep practicing them before you know it, they’ll become habits and make it easier to continue doing them without thinking about it.
We’ve even got some suggestions to get you started with little acts of kindness here if you need help getting started.
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